Boom

So back in January, all the delightful college kids went home for the holidays.  I had sent out reminders in December about paying January rent.  Experience told me that they would all forget once they got home. 

Of course about a quarter of my tenants forgot to pay rent.  Here is the lovely exchange I had with a parent via text about their child's rent.  On January 16th:

Hover Mother: My son says he owes for January.  I tried to get online and pay but it won't let me.
Me: Online pay has not been available since October.
Hover Mother: No I always pay online.
Me: Maybe before October.  But his October, November, and December rent were not paid online. It is no longer offered as it is very expensive for such a small company.
Hover Mother: I know for a fact I paid online, I am not sure why you are lying.
Me: I can give you the check number that you used to pay his rent, if that would help you.  Also, do you need to know the amount of the late fee so you can include it in his January rent?
Hover Mother: I am not paying a late fee.  It is your fault because you took away the online this month. 
Me: Mam, This will now be the fourth month it has been gone.  Here are your check number's from the previous months ###, ###, ###.  They were all received in the office by the 1st.  From you.  We allowed a grace period the first month the online pay was gone so people could get used to the online pay being gone. We are not doing that this month.
Hover Mother:  I need to speak to you boss, I am not sure why you insist on being so rude and lying.
Me: I am the boss. 
Hover Mother: I don't believe you.
Me: I'm not sure how to help you.  He owes for January.  It is late.  None of that is rude or a lie.  Please let me know if you would like the late fee total.
Hover mother: Do you own the property?
Me: No.
Hover Mother:  I want to speak to the owner. 
Me: He won't tell you anything different than me and I manage the properties, not him.
Hover Mother: I want to speak to him now.  (she calls instead of texts at this point.)

At this point I call in the owner to sit in on the phone call, I put her on speaker and we begin a lovely chat.

Hover Mother:  Jane has been extremely rude to me regarding the January rent.  I need to get this taken care of and I think it is absurd that she is requiring us to pay a late fee. Can you help us get this resolved?
Owner: Yes, she has made me aware of the situation.  I have read the texts.  I am not sure where the confusion is. What can I do for you to help?
Hover Mother: She is telling me lies and.... (owner cuts her off)
Owner:  Actually mam, I am looking over the rent records, and Jane is correct.  You paid via check the last few months.  Not online.  So I know you were aware there was no online pay.  Also the check always arrived by the 1st so it would seem you also are aware of when it is due.  So again, if you could tell me where your confusion is, I would gladly help you.  Were you just needing to know the total of the late fee so you could add it to your rent.
Hover mother: (silence)
Owner:  I am going back to my office, Jane can assist you from this point on.
Me: Mam, would you like that total?
Hover Mother: (quietly, yes)

Me:

I'm Baaaa-ack

I would like to tell you that it has clamed down and that is why I have not been posting but, alas, that would be a lie.  They are still crazy, and I am still losing my mind with their antics.  I think I have been upgraded from the Mayor of Idiotville, to the Governor of Crazy.  (edit: just checked on an old post and I had already promoted myself from mayor to captain of the crazy train.  So, in very exciting news, this is my second promotion in less than a year!)

They actually drove through another wall.  Another one.  How does this happen???  This time it wasn't a tenant, just a random person.  But still.  It happened.  Some cars were broken into, which is of course my fault.  Rent went unpaid.  Again, my fault.  Drunk people broke stuff, idiots lost stuff, crazies lied about stuff.  All in all it has been a pretty exciting few months.

We just went through 3 months of move outs and move ins.  And I do have some pretty good stuff from that. 

And then there was the most bat-shit crazy mom I have ever encountered who managed to call me 52 times in just under an hour.  That is not a typo that does say 52. 

I will spend the next few weeks getting all caught up with the past few months worth of stories.  And I can assure there will be some good ones to come because I have a really amazing crop of special little snowflakes who just moved in. 

I am pretty excited to start sharing!!  Wait for it......

Elephant Heard

The girls that live above my office often sound like a heard of elephants.  They stomp.  They definitely don't know how to walk in heals.  I often wonder if they are teaching aerobics up there.  And today I think they might be playing tag.  It is so loud!!!  And to top it off one of them really really likes Adele.  And I feel like it might be my duty to tell her not to quit to her day job.  (Not that she probably has a job.  I am sure her parents are paying for her rent and funding her future failed singing career.)  But she is belting it out.  And the best thing I can compare it to is a cat dying.  And that might be too friendly.   I have turned up my music but I can still hear it.  Somebody help me..... 


Update:  One hour later, I am pretty sure they just have Hello on repeat.  Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

Promotion

This is normally our quietest time of the year.  The students are gone.  The adults that live here are relaxed and enjoying a break from the idiots.  All is calm.......  Nope. Not this year.  

We have had multiple broken windows.  We had to evict a commercial tenant.  There has been some break ins.  Two roofs are leaking.  Our maintenance mans wife had a baby so he isn't here.  My boss is beginning his annual freak out over pre-leasing.  (We are far ahead of where we have ever been for this time of year so he is just going to need to chill the ef out.)   And that is just the last 5 days.  

And while all of this has been happening we were working on a project to submit a bid for more properties.  Because why not.  We need to add to the chaos.  That is a great idea. 

Now I am not one to complain (pause for laughter) but this isn't making me feel all Christmassy.

And just to make it more fun about half our tenants paid rent late this month.  Which of course they felt was my fault.  I think I am promoting myself from mayor of idiotville to captain of the insane train.  I think it has a nicer ring. 

All This

This.

Short and sweet

Convo with my boss.....

Me: do you have any heartburn meds? 

Boss: yes. In my desk drawer. Under the gun.

Me: ***(sigh)*** Do you think that says something about this job?

Boss: that it's exciting and we eat well?

Me: ********facepalm********

Ummmm..... Yeah......

This basically sums up this week.  It has been insane.  This should be one of our quietest times of the year.  The students are wrapping up finals and leaving town.  My grown up tenants are kicking back and enjoying the silence.  Our maintenance guys get a much needed break from constant running.  But nope.  No peace for me. I am worn out this week.  This week is how crazy it used to be and what drove me to leave.  I have to remind myself over and over this week that this is just one week.  Just one weird and crazy week.  There has been evictions, threats, a tenant accidentally texting me about their drug deal, and a never ending project we are working on to acquire another property, because we really need to add some more units to our crazy days.  Sure.  Why not. When I have more than 2 minutes I will share all my fun stories from this week. 

Merry Christmas!!!!!  Tis the season to be a jerk!!!